Gallo Update

As part of our relentless effort to monitor Houston's least-favorite no-talent assclown, Mike Gallo can at least brag that his meatballs proved to only be the appetizer in the Dodgers' 8th inning feast on the Astros' bullpen Tuesday night. The Astros' ace lefty specialist was brought on to face lefty OF Kenny Lofton, who promptly singled to center field. That brings Lofton's numbers this year to a clean 2-for-2 against Gallo. Lefties as a group are now batting .438 against Gallo. Gallo has now failed to retire a single batter two times in his last three outings. Only Lofton's baserunning mistake prevented Gallo from picking up an earned run in his zero innings of work, which would have merely rocketed the Rooster's ERA to yet another level of the far reaches of the stratosphere.

Much has been said and written by the mainstream media about the struggles of Lidge, Qualls and Wheeler, who all have clearly been performing below their career averages for the first month of this season. Gallo has been likewise performed below his career averages so far in 2006. However, the difference lies in that Lidge, Qualls and Wheeler have all established themselves as quality relief pitchers in the years leading up to this season, whereas Mike Gallo has never done this. There is hope for Lidge, Qualls and Wheeler. The only hope for Gallo is that he has a Brokeback moment with Wandy and contracts that vicious throat-blister syndrome, which would ideally sideline him for months, if not years.

For his career, lefties have hit .282 against Mike Gallo. That does include seven home runs in 56+ innings, but it does not include the additional 20 walks that lefties have drawn against him. Hitters in general have posted a .289 batting average against him. His career WHIP is 1.50. For a situational reliever, that is an especially important stat, and one which illustrates just how absurd it is that Phil Garner continues to rely on Gallo in key situations.

Even if Gallo rights himself and returns to his career norms for the remainder of the season, he is still a flat-out poor pitcher. Garner is to certainly to blame for continuing to turn to Gallo on a regular basis. Purpura may not have the authority and/or the guts to make a blockbuster deal to shake up this team, but each day that passes with Mike Gallo occupying a spot on the major-league roster is equivalent to T-Poo handing Garner the matches and the gasoline, rendering the GM guilty of nothing less than conspiracy to commit arson.

Keep in mind that while Mike Gallo continues to participate, Chris Burke continues to sit. That's a whole issue in and of itself, which will be addressed at a later date.